Have you ever wondered how you can be the top dog at work but can’t translate your dynamic skill set across other areas of your life – particularly your intimate relationship?
Maybe it’s because no one teaches us how to be good husbands, wives, lovers or partners. Maybe it’s because we’re left with too little energy after our 16-hour days to be King of the World at home, too.
Or maybe it’s because we’re frequently sold a false bill of goods about relationships: “that they shouldn't feel like work". But guess what? They are work. Contrary to what we want to believe, every great relationship requires effort to succeed.
In fact, our homes – both physical and metaphorical – require as much attention as our careers. If you don’t tend to the little things, your home slowly slips into disrepair. Likewise, if you invest the time and effort needed to keep it strong, you elevate your home to your castle, your spouse/love to your king or queen.
This concept eluded me for years. You see, I was a successful Wall Street executive, a master in my field, making 7 figures and spending 80+ hours a week in the office. I had the edge, a level of success that most men spend a lifetime trying to achieve. And I still couldn’t figure out why I had various challenges in my marriage – challenges that were about to hit a crisis point.
As I focused intensely on building my empire, I watched as my castle fell down around me. Little things that needed fixing kept getting pushed into the “maybe next weekend” category. As you know, “next weekend” never comes. Little by little, one thing after the other, home issues started piling up. Trim that needed painting slowly rotted; a small leak by the back porch led to major reconstruction issues; a simple un-replaced belt for the house fan led to 10+ summers of sweltering suffering.
But man, was I successful at work.
What I didn’t realize at the time is that neglect had become a habit in all areas of my life – except work. (And truthfully, it may have even started to creep in there too.)
Then, seemingly out of nowhere, my marriage crumbled. The one thing I took for granted as a “given” quickly fell apart – all because I hadn’t been paying attention. I resigned myself to failure because I didn’t have the tools or skills to fix it, and I knew it. I ended up divorced, a small fortune in legal fees and settlements, and an even higher emotional cost paid. I managed to screw up a lot of additional relationships with family and friends along the way, too. Divorce sucks for everyone in your life.
At the end, I kept asking myself: How could a millionaire exec be “flat broke” at home? How can so many men in “ok” or “not so good” relationships fool themselves into thinking that “this is as good as it gets?”
Afterwards, I spent nearly three years in counseling – and thousands of more dollars – trying to heal old wounds and figure out how things failed. Guess what? Counseling didn’t give me the answers I needed. I found myself repeating past mistakes all over again with my new love, the most beautiful woman in the world. I struggled to find a way to “fix” things. Was it a matter of “simple” neglect? How was it impacting other areas of my life? Was I showing up as the man I needed to be? Was I making the effort needed to create and maintain an extraordinary relationship?
I simply didn’t know.
Then one day, I spoke to a friend who’s been in a phenomenal relationship for decades. At the end of our conversation, it hit me in the head like a ton of bricks: “The one thing in common in both my dysfunctional relationships was ME.” My insecurities and limiting beliefs. My inconsistent efforts. My blame thrown onto both circumstances and at the other person. Through my friend I realized that, as a man, I wasn’t there to contribute “50%” to the totality of our relationship: it was my job to bring 100% of myself to the relationship every day.
I asked my friend to coach and mentor me on my personal journey to become a man capable of creating and sustaining my dream relationship. In the first 15 days alone, I had several amazing breakthroughs, which all completely transformed how I approached my new love.
Breakthrough #1: Neither my lady nor I needed to be “fixed” in any way. Contrary to what either of us believed, she wasn’t a broken little bird. I wasn’t a wounded lion. Sure, we both had our “stuff.” We both wore prior battle scars. But despite anything that happened to either of us in the past, we inherently possessed everything we needed to love each other completely in the present. The challenge now became a matter of developing the right skills – and the right routines – to release everything we held inside us.
Breakthrough #2: I had a lot of bad scripts running in my head about what she and I were capable of – both individually, and as a couple. “She needs to change this or that, and then everything will be perfect.” “Maybe I’m just a type-A jerk who can’t be loved.” “If I couldn’t make it work with the mother of my children, what chance do I have with this woman?” And on and on. Know what? Those are all BS stories we tell ourselves to mask our deepest fear: that, despite all the other success we have, we’re “not enough” in the most basic of ways. As soon as I learned how to rewrite those stories, those lies in my head, it immediately released me from the emotional prison I had locked myself in my entire adult life.
Breakthrough #3: if you don’t show up at home the same way you show up work, your home life doesn’t stand a chance. I realized that I cultivated an awful habit over the years. After I left work, I basically stepped on a conveyor belt and spent the rest of the day mindlessly and effortlessly moving along it. I wasn’t fully present at home. I was too busy winding down. And while I’d earned the right to do so after a hard day’s work, I hadn’t earned any right to wind away what little time I had left for my relationship. When I realized I needed to manage my home life like I managed a P&L sheet, the shift in focus shifted the entire game.
If you’re still reading, much of this must resonate. It doesn’t surprise me. This story is far more common among career-driven people like us than anyone cares to admit. Not so common is knowing what to do about it.
And that’s where The Ultimate Relationship Academy comes in.
Imagine how every area of your life could change if you showed up, fully present and fully committed. Imagine your spouse/love greeting you every day in ways that you only dream of, both emotionally and sexually. Imagine your home life becoming home-base for significant improvements across all areas of your existence. Imagine making love with such depth and feeling that you wonder why it wasn’t like that from the very beginning.
That’s the power of this course. The power to finally get good with yourself so you can be good with someone else. The power to stop self-sabotaging, and to stop the nagging voices that prevent you from the hearing the truth. The power to stand fully exposed without the slightest fear of being truly seen. And the power to check your ego so you can stand as something far greater – the Man, the Lover and Protector you were always meant to be.
Wouldn’t NOW be a great time to start that journey, before it's too late?
The Ultimate Relationship Academy is a 6-week personal development course that gives you the tools and skills needed to turn any relationship into the relationship of your dreams and making it a daily reality. This isn't some quick fix. It doesn't change things for a moment, but for the rest of your life.
As your coach and mentor on this personal exploration, I’ll distill everything I learned over the years into daily practices you can start applying immediately. You’ll be shocked at the major difference some of these small practices will have on your mindset and emotional balance. You’ll also be able to learn from all my mistakes and false starts – so you don’t have to make them yourself. Saving your years of trial and error.
After all, you wouldn’t structure the largest deal of your career without guidance from your senior advisory team. Neither should you structure a plan for ultimate personal fulfillment without an expert in your corner. I am that expert and I am fully committed to being your personal coach
This intensive, 6-week, accelerated course is designed to quickly break down the barriers currently preventing you from having the relationship of your dreams. The commitment to take this course is great and honors the commitment you made to your spouse/love. Using varying timeless techniques, you'll be shown how to develop the deepest levels of love, how to build upon the history you and your spouse/love already share and use what you've leaned to transform your habits for a lifetime.
As you’re primed for each day’s new topic, tools, and skills, you’ll learn their significance, and how to integrate them into the proceeding day.
Once the 6-week intensive ends, you will continue to have access to all the materials (for life), so that you can continue your journey and further cement in the hard work you already completed. It will also give you the opportunity to go back and work areas that need further attention, allowing you to continually refine your approach, much like a master craftsman sharpens his saw.
All so you can fully step into your power as Mr. or Mrs. Right, and permanently leave behind all the “wrongs” you used to live by.
Four and five day classes on similar topics by many "relationship gurus" often run upwards of five figures, are delivered in an old hotel ballrooms with hundreds of other people and almost never seem to deliver on their promise. Even a decent marriage counselor and two years of therapy will cost as much – and, most of the time, won’t produce half the results that this course will deliver. You shouldn’t have to settle for subpar results, or seminars that simply talk about the tools to use, but don't give you the skills to apply them to your unique relationship. You shouldn’t have to settle for anything less than you deserve.
And now, with The Ultimate Relationship Academy, you don’t have to.
It’s time for you to exude the same confidence and control in your love life as you do in the office. So let’s get to work and get you on the path to renewed passion and happiness. Let’s make the life you live outside of work – and the commitment you make to your spouse/love – the ultimate measure of your success. Enroll in The Ultimate Relationship Academy right now. Your true destiny is calling.
Live with Purpose, Live Inspired, Live with Love
Your coach and mentor,